driving (explicit content)

So, I took the liberty of recording my drive to & from school today, thinking I could listen to it & write down the awesome things I say & sing & yell while I drive by myself. Which will now prove why I drive by myself usually. Needless to say, I cuss a lot. Apologies in advance.

Why is it so hot
Oh balls that is some bright sunshine
Move you dumbass
No, please, you go, not like it was my turn or anything
My God could we go any slower
You could’ve made that light
Get off of my ass, please
Shitfuck, that was so unnecessary
That’s what makes you beautiful
Oh ewww you’re ugly
I’m going around you, grandpa
Signal, you douche
Ugh, fuck you
Really could you not
Make that make that make that ugh fuck you
Go faster or move
Whoa balls that’s a cop
This is the freeway why are we going fifty
Ugh I hate trucks
Ugh I hate cops
Ugh I hate you
Switch switch switch yeahhhh
Let me in, goddamnit
Really could you not
Oh hey you are very cute
Hey that looks like _______’s car
Oh shit is that _________
Oh, it’s okay
I’ve got the moves like Jagger
No seriously, I have the fucking moves like Jagger
Move Jagger, get out of my way
Excuse me, I need to exit
Let me in, you assface
Wow, could we be going any slower
It says right lane keep moving
Can you learn to read
Open your eyes
That is a yellow light
Okay, it’s time to go now
They’re turning
I’m gonna run you over
Excuse me, I have the right of way
We should switch cars
Ugh, I hate you so much
You’re the worst neighbors ever
You should just move away
Wow Dad could you park any further

Yeah, so that’s what it’s like to drive with me. Don’t worry though, I’m nothing at all like this around other people.